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We have established a plan that will ensure that our children will have physical, financial, and emotional care if something happens to us.

My wife, Misten, and I have four children.  Our lives are dedicated to loving and caring for them.  During the average day, we make them breakfast, lunch and dinner, make sure that they have clean clothes to wear and have their school work complete.  We guide and comfort them through life’s challenges and celebrate life’s blessings and joys.  We provide shelter, safety, and education.  We also work hard to instill in them the values and principles that we hold dear while allowing them the opportunity to develop each of their unique personalities.  Like other parents, we want to ensure that these same things will be provided to them if something ever happened to us.

Our estate plan gives us the tools to name the people we trust to take care of our children, to provide the source of support for them, and even share our values and beliefs.  Here is a basic explanation of how, in part, this may be done:

Revocable Living Trust  Our Trust provides the framework for supporting our children financially.  It names a trustee to manage our assets and use them exclusively for our children’s benefit.  We choose our trustee based on a number of factors including their trustworthiness, their capability to competently handle or delegate business decisions, and their like-mindedness with us.  We want to rest assured that if we are gone, our trustee will be a good steward and, in turn, a source of stability and comfort for our children.

Our trustee will be charged with the task of investing and maintaining our assets.  If we die while our children are still minors, the trustee will use those assets to provide shelter, including in our family home, if the trustee believes that it will benefit the children to remain in the home.  The trustee will also provide money to our children’s guardian for food, clothing, medical expenses, education, recreation, etc. in the same way that we do as their parents.

We can establish benchmarks or ages so that as our children get older, the trustee may distribute part or all of our children’s share of trust assets.  However, if one of our children is making poor decisions, the trustee may also have discretion to withhold payments if the trustee believes that it will not benefit the child, or if the child would use it in a wasteful manner, just as we would as their parents.  In this way, we can feel confident that the trustee can provide guidance and direction to our children in our absence.

Guardian  Our estate plan also names a person or people that we trust to provide the loving care that we provide as parents.  Our children’s guardians will provide the day-to-day care for them, and in essence, be their parents.  Guardians are responsible for a child’s care, custody, and control, including medical care and education.  We choose a guardian based on that person’s ability to provide the loving care that most aligns with our philosophies and values as parents.

Legacy Letter or Video A non-legal, but nevertheless valuable tool is a “legacy letter”.  This is a relatively new name for an age-old practice.  The general idea is that you document your values and principles for your children’s benefit.  As parents, we learned lessons from our parents as well as lessons learned “the hard way” through our life experiences.  Naturally, we desire to pass these lessons on to our children in hopes that it will make their lives better and help them avoid making mistakes.  It is our legacy.

There is no hard and fast formula for the contents of a legacy letter or video.  Some people maintain a written journal or a video diary with the intent of leaving it for their children while others simply write and rewrite letters.  If you want to create something that will last for generations, consider hiring a filmmaker to create a documentary.  The ultimate goal is to provide a way to share your wisdom with your children.  No matter the form, consider the lessons that you have learned and want to pass on to your children and begin to record them for their benefit.

These are just a sample of some thoughts and methods for planning for your children in the event of your death.  As always, every family is different and those differences have very real consequences that estate planning attorneys are trained to detect and, in turn, prepare a plan that is well-suited to your circumstances.  Have a conversation with your spouse about your cares and concerns and then make an appointment with a dedicated, experienced estate planning attorney so that you may feel confident that you have established a plan that will provide for your children in your absence.

Nick Reister is an estate planning attorney with Smith Haughey Rice & Roegge in Grand Rapids, Michigan. If you have questions about estate planning or other legal matters, please call (616) 774-8000.

The information contained on this site is for general information purposes only and should not be relied upon as legal advice. Please contact legal counsel to discuss your specific needs and circumstances.